Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Another Hug Story

Click the "Play" button to listen the podcast.

Some of you may know that a “Hug” is one of my favorite Positive Discipline Tools. During this podcast you will understand why as I interview Beth Whitehead after she sent me the following success story.

Dear Jane,

As you may remember, I had a situation with my older daughter (3 yrs old) taking toys away from our littler one (1 1/2 years).  My new behavior was to try hugging the older one when she was being a bully.  SO, something came up today that I really wanted to share:

I was past my patience level and almost yelling at Eden (3) to go sit on the couch, rather than staying underfoot as I was loading the dryer and hassling her little sister for some reason or another.  She was also crying and possibly about to tantrum.  I stopped and just hugged her, as we discussed.  It was PERFECT!  She stopped crying & whining. And then SHE suggested we hug the little one.  I didn't have to do anything else.

Another quick story: Eden was in full tantrum on a different occasion and I thought back to our exercise of asking for a hug.  That worked, too!  It totally diffused the situation and she calmed down.

Also, I taught my daughter to say, "I need attention" when she just needs a hug or for me to stop doing whatever I am doing.  It works so well and is so much better than my getting annoyed and not noticing that she needs me to stop and pay her more attention.

I feel like I am finally on my way to really helping my babies feel understood.  Thank you for all you do Jane!!

Very Sincerely,


1 comment:

Rhys Klu said...

Hello Dr. Jane Nelsen. I was listening to the podcast with Beth Whitehead her hugging her daughter when she was misbehaving and I was moved by how effective your technique was at stopping her elder daughter from misbehaving. I must admit, hugging a child when they are misbehaving seems crazy but after hearing how it stopped Beth Whitehead's older duaghter from misbehaving, I was won over. What is even more amazing is Beth Whitehead didn't have to resort to the more traditional means of disciplining a child, which I was stunned by. Listening to this podcast really brightened up my day and I hope many parents follow suit in using your technique and following Beth Whitehead's example. I'm going to subscribe to your rss feed now just on the strength of this podcast.
I truly believe positive discipline is the most effective way of disciplining a child.
Please keep up the good work and take care Dr. Jane Nelsen.