Some of you may know that a “Hug” is one of my favorite Positive Discipline Tools. During this podcast you will understand why as I interview Beth Whitehead after she sent me the following success story.
Dear Jane,
As you may remember, I had a situation with my older daughter (3 yrs old) taking toys away from our littler one (1 1/2 years). My new behavior was to try hugging the older one when she was being a bully. SO, something came up today that I really wanted to share:
I was past my patience level and almost yelling at Eden (3) to go sit on the couch, rather than staying underfoot as I was loading the dryer and hassling her little sister for some reason or another. She was also crying and possibly about to tantrum. I stopped and just hugged her, as we discussed. It was PERFECT! She stopped crying & whining. And then SHE suggested we hug the little one. I didn't have to do anything else.
Another quick story: Eden was in full tantrum on a different occasion and I thought back to our exercise of asking for a hug. That worked, too! It totally diffused the situation and she calmed down.
Also, I taught my daughter to say, "I need attention" when she just needs a hug or for me to stop doing whatever I am doing. It works so well and is so much better than my getting annoyed and not noticing that she needs me to stop and pay her more attention.
I feel like I am finally on my way to really helping my babies feel understood. Thank you for all you do Jane!!
Very Sincerely,
Beth
1 comment:
Hello Dr. Jane Nelsen. I was listening to the podcast with Beth Whitehead her hugging her daughter when she was misbehaving and I was moved by how effective your technique was at stopping her elder daughter from misbehaving. I must admit, hugging a child when they are misbehaving seems crazy but after hearing how it stopped Beth Whitehead's older duaghter from misbehaving, I was won over. What is even more amazing is Beth Whitehead didn't have to resort to the more traditional means of disciplining a child, which I was stunned by. Listening to this podcast really brightened up my day and I hope many parents follow suit in using your technique and following Beth Whitehead's example. I'm going to subscribe to your rss feed now just on the strength of this podcast.
I truly believe positive discipline is the most effective way of disciplining a child.
Please keep up the good work and take care Dr. Jane Nelsen.
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