Some of you may know that a “Hug” is one of my favorite Positive Discipline Tools. During this podcast you will understand why as I interview Beth Whitehead after she sent me the following success story.
Dear Jane,
As you may remember, I had a situation with my older daughter (3 yrs old) taking toys away from our littler one (1 1/2 years). My new behavior was to try hugging the older one when she was being a bully. SO, something came up today that I really wanted to share:
I was past my patience level and almost yelling at Eden (3) to go sit on the couch, rather than staying underfoot as I was loading the dryer and hassling her little sister for some reason or another. She was also crying and possibly about to tantrum. I stopped and just hugged her, as we discussed. It was PERFECT! She stopped crying & whining. And then SHE suggested we hug the little one. I didn't have to do anything else.
Another quick story: Eden was in full tantrum on a different occasion and I thought back to our exercise of asking for a hug. That worked, too! It totally diffused the situation and she calmed down.
Also, I taught my daughter to say, "I need attention" when she just needs a hug or for me to stop doing whatever I am doing. It works so well and is so much better than my getting annoyed and not noticing that she needs me to stop and pay her more attention.
I feel like I am finally on my way to really helping my babies feel understood. Thank you for all you do Jane!!
Very Sincerely,
Beth
Hello Dr. Jane Nelsen. I was listening to the podcast with Beth Whitehead her hugging her daughter when she was misbehaving and I was moved by how effective your technique was at stopping her elder daughter from misbehaving. I must admit, hugging a child when they are misbehaving seems crazy but after hearing how it stopped Beth Whitehead's older duaghter from misbehaving, I was won over. What is even more amazing is Beth Whitehead didn't have to resort to the more traditional means of disciplining a child, which I was stunned by. Listening to this podcast really brightened up my day and I hope many parents follow suit in using your technique and following Beth Whitehead's example. I'm going to subscribe to your rss feed now just on the strength of this podcast.
ReplyDeleteI truly believe positive discipline is the most effective way of disciplining a child.
Please keep up the good work and take care Dr. Jane Nelsen.